Sunday, March 15, 2015

If you doubt, don't !

Everybody's life goes through hell once in a lifetime for sure. Isn't it?
Does not matter how organized and perfect our lives look but there is always a story behind.
Pain, tears, distress, agony ,depression, pessimism are part of everybody's lives, on one point or another.
If we are living, we are struggling hard somewhere.
The biggest truth about life is the moment we think we have understood it, it makes us realize , we can never understand it.
Surprises, shocks ,situations and all of them unexpected but that is why  it is called life .

Once we are 25, we  actually start believing in  destiny because by this time ,we get to understand that there are certain things in this world which are beyond our comprehension and control.
But this realization is also the reason behind most of the mistakes we make thereafter.

We do not have the power to correct things, to bring back something which we wanted like hell. We just can't overpower the happenings.
In most of the situations like this, we revolt but the ways to revolt against this absurdity actually decide the rest of our lives.

For death, we don't know, still cannot decide whether to accept the philosophy of "Geeta" or  not but for life the best thing to conclude is that if we are still living, if we are still having the opportunity to breathe, we have to try !
We  have to try irrespective of how hard and difficult  life is.
We  have to try to make it better irrespective of how bad it is because that is why we are still not dead.
Our generation is  struggling in the midst of  love, lust, relationship and marriage.

Falling in love, very easy. Falling out of it even easier !
Lust comes as one of the important elements of love but exists even after the Love ends.
Relationship, comes as a commitment to marriage and evidence for love but cannot actually ensure anything in love or marriage.
People who have successfully crossed these stages of love and relationship and are married and are still in love with their partners are special  because it is something which requires  a lot of efforts, loyalty, patience and a continuous trait of honesty.
Whatever it is, love, career or anything else.
It is not going to affect our being in this world.
 Life is to live with happiness and to discover the happiness in the challenges which life puts.

If you are still not dead, it means you have the happiness stored for you but you have to continue living for that in a dignified way, in a satisfied way and in a right way.


                                                          
                                       
The most stupid mistake we make is that we start finding replacements for a particular person, relationship or a certain thing as soon we get into trouble.
We forget that it is only time which replaces things not us.

In relationships ,we often commit the same mistake of replacing the person which is quite impossible. We start thinking , life is absurd and since it is absurd , we should also behave absurd but that is where we make our life absurd.

There is a period where life goes through this absurdity and we have to get through this absurdity in order to discover the real  happiness.

We  will always find people who seems like a miracle in life but are actually to test our  understanding  of the absurdity which we went through.

We learn life's lesson. We understand how to deal with it and then we have to deal with it in practical.
We must save ourselves from situations which look like to be the remedy/compensation of the absurdity which we had to face but are actually more absurd.
                               
I have seen people who tries to find peace and love in anybody and everybody after a failed relationship and that is quite natural. We all want to be loved .
We all want to be loved by that one person whom we love. We all need care, attention and respect. But in this criticality, we often devalue ourselves.
If we don't get what we deserve, it is still okay but  if we try to get what is less than what we actually deserve, it is suicide.
In terms of earning  a livelihood, this concept can be applicable "something is better than nothing" but if it is  about a choice which  it is not a necessity , to  compromise is foolish.

It is difficult to say NO to desires but once we overcome desires, we  earn  respect for ourselves and that brings the happiness which even Time can't replace.
                                   
We all commit mistakes. We all fall victims to the situations we never expected.
We all cry. We all try to end up our lives at least once in a lifetime . We all have a story which is not a perfect one but that is absolutely fine. The best thing is we are still not dead and so we can still try. It is okay to make a mistake, cool to repeat it, natural to repeat is twice, thrice and for hundred times but if we are able to stop ourselves for the 101st  time and then not to do it ever again ,we will find happiness.

Everybody will get the happiness which he/she deserves. The only difference is if  we are ready to learn our lesson immediately, we will get it sooner .

We all go through the hell once in a lifetime but one who gets through it becomes the happy one.

We only need to understand;

If we are confused, let it go.

If we believe in something , we should stick to it irrespective of the absurdity it shows.

If You doubt , Don't !

Life is not given, Life means we have to make it worth living,  by our efforts.


http://deshaurhum.blogspot.in/                        http://nidhibharati88.blogspot.in/


Image courtesy : Google Images.
                                

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

En rendez-vous avec Life !!!: Men,Women and the World.

En rendez-vous avec Life !!!: Men,Women and the World.: Theories of evolution say that women are evolved in such a way that they are physically weaker than men. Well! This is actually not the ...

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Men,Women and the World.

Theories of evolution say that women are evolved in such a way that they are physically weaker than men. Well! This is actually not the way we say it. The most common, used and heard version is"Men are stronger than women" and most of the times the word stronger doesn't mean physically only but it includes the emotional and other philosophical terms too and so it is considered than Men are stronger than women andYes! indeed they are ! My mother never carries the LPG cylinder back to kitchen once it is delivered at  the main gate.I never carry the wheat bag which weighs 25kg from the grocery to my car and of  course there is no Lady James Bond or Super Woman or Iron woman or steel woman or lady Shaktimaan or Lady Krishh or sadly anybody. So, physically men are stronger and it is  proven, seen, shown, very much obvious and I agree .
Between Man and woman this difference was the only factor which shaped the nature and principles of evolution. During evolution of mankind their ability to walk on two legs rendered a significant advantage over other creatures still walking on four legs. Now man could hold weapons in his hands and less number of members were needed during a hunting exercise. This enabled humans to keep their females carrying new-born in hideouts away from dangers during hunting and gathering food. Women and children were safe and mortality rate declined sharply for humans. Men and women have evolved like this. Men used to go out for hunting. They used to bring food and women used to protect and raise children until they were prepared to go out  with their fathers for hunting. The prime objective of preventing women from going out was to save them from getting hurt and wounded and behind that the simplest idea was to save women because without them any species cannot grow or survive. A pregnant woman  is not supposed to perform physically tough tasks or for a physically unfit woman it is difficult to conceive so women used to stay and men used to go out. So THIS IS HOW IT IS. Then gradually time changed. Hunters, gatherers and then farmers; as the civilisations flourished , different kinds of work and skills developed.

Humans developed different set of skills among them and few specialised their skills; this resulted in division of labour. A man or woman having a distinguished set of skills performed one kind of  service to the society and in turn benefitted from skills of others in another need of his /her life. Men and women stayed together, worked together and co operated each other and the species flourished, population grew and the concept of family, society and community came into existence but in the core  it was always about a man and a woman. The two smallest individual units who comes together to form this world .But what kept them united? Why they chose to support each other ? How they survived and evolved together? To understand this science gives a term  INTERDEPENDENCE. For Survival and regeneration man and woman depended on each other in a way or several ways and that is how stability in communities and at a core level stability in a man-woman relation was maintained. The institution of marriage came into picture and eventually it became one of the pillars of  the culture and civilization and here we are in 2014,in a different world, in a different time where the principle theories of human evolution and coexistence has taken a new form.

Man and woman  relation is changed and woman as the weaker counterpart is still struggling to overcome the effect of evolving as a physically weaker sapiens. Equality has not been achieved after numerous efforts. Either one suffers or rules and most unfortunately women are the one who are evolved to suffer. I  cannot trace when it started as a practice but I am very certain about the fact that it was certainly not a principle of evolution. Nature provides equality to every species so women and her sufferings are not natural. It  started due to the physical  weakness of women but is still  practised because of the mental weakness of men. Why and where things went wrong is still a question but the wrong  still being practised is a threat.It is always said that good and evil are balanced somehow.If evil will surpass good then world will come to an end but actually the balance is a myth.

I see marriage as an institution which came into existence only after a point of time when men and women both realized that apart from the survival and the regeneration, they needed to trust each other for peace, harmony and to build a better society.They needed to be with each other in order to give their ontogenies the necessary brought-up. However, the problem started when this institution turned into a tool to torture women and this was not country or region specific.Nature has crafted women in such a way that she never gives up the responsibility which comes with being woman and this has caused a lot of trouble in shaping her place in the patriarchal society.There is a constant conflict between dignity and responsibility and in most of the cases dignity is defeated by responsibility. Again this is under scanner because dignity of a woman is defined in a different dictionary which has certain bizarre explanations and vocabulary. Nevertheless, Woman finds it always difficult to choose between her dignity and her responsibility and it makes her weak, not physically but mentally and this weakness or can we say the inherent nature has been proved  both as a boon and a curse. Curse because world is very good in taking things for granted and when people see things working for them,they take it as a natural phenomenon.

A virgin boy exists nowhere and a virgin girl is being sold at the highest price.This is the world we live in. For a man,employment matters and for woman her virginity. If a boy follows a girl ,he is called romantic and when a girl does the same,she is called desperate. I wonder sometimes how it all would have started.Why it is always tough for a girl to decide her direction. If a man is single ,there must be a love story but if a girl is,then it must be  a heartbreak. The parameters must be changed in the mind of the people.

People say relations are mutual responsibilities but  for  women why it becomes duty? That is a question which needs to be answered not because women want equality but because this world, nature and the human existence need equality. Man and woman both shares the same responsibility of  the regeneration of human species, so the concept of dignity must be equal. If men are physically stronger,they need to learn to overcome their mental sickness and if women are physically weaker,they need to overcome the fear of being a victim. It is true that man and woman compliment each other but women need to understand the difference between complimenting and compromising.Evolution never taught to suffer,it only demanded survival. Survival not as a victim but as  the fittest.

                   Women need to remember this and Men must not forget it.


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